Happy Birthday

I’ve started to fear the tick-tocking of the clock, I can hear the sound of the shovel hitting the grass, and I can sense the rat-a-tat-tat of the soil on wood. I can feel my ankles ache; my knees give way when I’m not expecting it and my shoulders are sore just from waking up. The list of things I’ve given up is getting longer than the things I can still enjoy, just thinking about drinking brings the bile rising from my stomach to the back of my throat and I feel dizzy and light-headed just smelling coffee in the evening. It’s my birthday today, I lie back and listen to the rat-a-tat-tat of the soil hitting the wood.